Friday, August 18, 2006
sian... sian...sian... and more sian....
this few days have been realli sucky for me... i realli hate my life... haix... i dunno why i wanna act magnanimous where by i'm not... haix... mebbe because i feel that i shld do so ba... yesterday... i was home playing com in the morning and den went to third aunt's place to pick-up the electronic dictionary... was quite surprise to see my cousins at home... den my grand-ma said something tat realli made my day but i decided not to say... haha... den i went home and on the way and saw my cousin, judith, at her house downstairs... she was just back from school... haha... den i went to heartland mall's popular to get some stationary... haix... was quite ex actually... den went to buy some food and went home... den played com and studied a bit for the whole night... it's was quite tiring and bored yesterday... den today... i met clement, isaac and chu jun to study... i actually onli studied a little bit today... haix... no mood to study... dunno why... den i ate 2 meals in macdonalds today... haix... growing fatter le... haix... den went to jalan jalan in heartland mall with eric a while... den also went to play arcade with clement and isaac... den went back to mac and den went home.. something happen tat is out of my expectation tat make me happi for a moment... den i reach home and played com... now i am tired and just fully tired... i'm just tired of everything and i realli hope to clear everything out of my mind... haix... den when i was playing maple... i am realli sadden by something but i do not wish to say.. cos i dun think it's necessary at this point... my feeling at this very point is super duper sad and feel lyke crying... but i wont cry... i have to be strong and magnanimous... things may not go my way but as long as you are happi... i dun mind being the bad guy... as long as you have a good time in the future with tat person... i will be happy to give you my blessing and become the bad guy in your memory... wad i say sometimes may not be from my heart... but i gotta say so becos i think if it's for you good... i will do it so tat your future is secured to be full of happiness and not sadness with me... i have to be strong so if i acted strong in front of you.. i'm sorry.... cos i need to do so... i have to be more matured and think of the future although i dun need to but i still did... hope my decision will bring you joy and happiness... but if this decision is wrong... pls direct me back if you are willing to... i hope i've made the right decision... thanks kor for your advice and didi for your concern.... i will be strong and move towards where i shld go....
